Yesterday I shared that God had led me to give a talk but wouldn’t allow me to write it out ahead of time. He is teaching me how to be more dependent on Him. I accepted. However, I put up a fuss the whole way.
I was nervous, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat on the morning of the talk. I simply didn’t trust Him to put the words in my mouth when I needed them. I’m not afraid of public speaking (I love it, actually) but I have discovered that I am very afraid of public speechlessness!
In the end, however, He did give me the words. I spoke from my heart and shared His heart, and I didn’t stumble or search for a lost word even once. I can’t remember what I said, but a friend who was there said it sounded like I knew in advance everything I would say. That’s because God knew.
Now I’ve had yet another lesson in trusting Him and in His faithfulness. Now that it’s over, I can say: It was worth it.